I saw this topic come through in the FB group a few weeks ago and made a mental note to cover it at some point. It seemed like there were a lot of you struggling with feeling “stuck” or “in a rut” so I thought I’d offer my advice…because believe me, I’ve been there. I think 2020 in general felt like the biggest f*cking rut ever and there were months where I wasn’t feeling like myself. I wasn’t working out, I didn’t feel the usual energy to get my day started and accomplish sh*t, and it took a while for me to get out of it.
There have obviously been several other times in my life when I’ve felt the same way, whether it’s a month-long thing or even a couple of rough days. Here’s what has worked for me. It’s not to say you can snap your fingers and feel better – sometimes I think you need to just accept the stage – but it’s a game plan.
+ SET A DATE: I live by my calendar so if I’m in a rut, I trick myself into having a start date to get out of it. I book it out a while so I have time to prep, usually at the start of the week, and give myself until that date to be in my feelings and laziness.
+ BOOK A GETAWAY: This was impossible in 2020 and honestly I still feel a bit stuck at home with both kids, but we’re getting there. If you can, I can’t recommend this step enough. Even a 1-2 night staycation will help get you out of your environment and to reset. Plus, the anticipation of a getaway alone is enough to shift my mood.
+ DO SOMETHING FUN: Maybe it’s a girl’s night where you have one too many glasses of rosé without regrets, or maybe it’s a few hours at the beach with your family. Just put something on your calendar that makes you happy and commit to it.
+ LIMIT THE BOOZE: OK other than the girl’s night out from above, I find that drinking my rut away never works. In fact, it adds to the spiral. Give yourself a couple of nights of wine or whatever but as you get close to your ‘restart day’, put away the vino and get clear-headed.
+ PAY FOR WORKOUTS: I finally got out of my 2020 rut by booking appointments with my trainer outside. I’m surprisingly frugal when it comes to wasting money so I knew I’d keep my commitment, and it worked. See if you can find a friend to book a few classes with so you have double commitment issues (the money and the friend) and sweat it out.
+ DO A BRAIN DUMP: I’ll write whatever is coming to mind and try to get to the root of why I’m feeling stuck. Am I bored with work? Stressed about the kids? Not feeling good about my body? From there, I focus on the main negative thing hovering over my life and put together a specific plan of action. So if it’s work, I do a big Pinterest mood board to find inspo for products or a launch. If it’s the kids, I know I need a break or something bougie like a spa afternoon. If it’s my body, I book a workout and make a healthy meal. Get specific!
+ VENT: Paul and I are always there for each other and it’s one of the things I value most in our relationship. And sometimes, you just need to f*cking VENT. Paul and I both agree that getting our thoughts out to someone is an immediate release of feelings, so there are nights where I warn him that I need to vent and I do (these are the nights where wine is crucial). You could obviously see a therapist if you want ongoing sessions like this…and I’m pretty sure Paul would point me there if this was a daily thing. The point being, don’t be afraid to vent to your guy / a friend / a professional.
+ SWITCH IT UP: 2020 was an ongoing rut for me because every day felt like Groundhog’s Day. I missed my weeks being filled with different meetings or events or literally anything but a mundane at-home routine every single day. And it taught me the importance of switching things up. Whether it’s shifting to a new industry (here’s how), working out somewhere new, making a recipe you haven’t before (like one of mine), try switching things up until you get out of the rut.
How do you get out of a rut?