Recently I held a Q+A on my IG Stories and someone has asked what my Enneagram score was. Huh?? Rather than Googling I let you guys do the work for me and explain that it is a personality test that gives you a score based on your answers that helps you better understand yourself. Sold. I love anything that will help me further understand me. It might sound super self-absorbed, but I love learning about myself. I think the more I learn / understand about myself the more I am able to make better decisions for me. It also just gives peace of mind to understand why I react a certain way to things–for me, knowledge is power. For others, ignorance is bliss. I prefer to know.
I took the test, which took me about 15 minutes to complete, and scored Type 3–The Achiever. In a nutshell, it told me that I place high priority on my success, making sure I’m viewed as successful, and that I seek validation to feel worthy. That I have a fear of being a loser. I’m competitive, hard working, want to be admired, and highly focused on my goals. “Threes” have a lot of energy, are extroverts, charismatic, and are socially competent. They know how to present themselves, are confident, and and driven. They are good networkers.
Hmmm…I can identify with a lot of this. I hope you can appreciate the fact that I’m about to get super vulnerable with you guys and openly share my own perception of myself in comparison to these test results.
Yes, I have a fear of being a loser. It’s a not a fear I’m actively battling though, because I do feel very accomplished. I managed to take something I am passionate about and turn it into my career. I make good money, work with brands I respect and love, am my own boss, and have so much fun doing so. I am proud of this. However, I placed a lot of pressure on myself to get here. Becoming a blogger wasn’t something I knew I wanted to do from the beginning (since it wasn’t really a “thing” when it was time to get a big girl job), but I was always hustling in order to maximize my skills and abilities. I’ve pretty much been self-employed since I started college and wouldn’t have it any other way. I get a sick thrill from running my own business, making decisions, taking risks, and my favorite part, seeing success.
I have a bunch of friends in PR and their motto was always “fake it til you make it.” I loathe PR terms for the records (more on that another day), but I could really get behind this one. I felt like I needed to present myself a certain way to be taken seriously and it worked! While I don’t like to network, I know how to play the part. I know how to read my audience (not necessary YOU guys, but anyone I’m meeting with, a group at a party, etc.) and get shit done. That’s basically how I landed every job I’ve ever had. Some call it bullshit, I call it smart. You need to possess a level of awareness to do this successfully. And not to be misunderstood, I don’t fib or embellish my skills, but I know the way to make things sound good when talking about my skillset.
I’m definitely competitive, but more in a recreational setting. I actually feel high when I play games….the adrenaline gets to my head and I NEEEEEED to win. I do find myself hard working–I don’t fuck around. I get shit done. I want things done correctly. If I find myself procrastinating about something in my business, I have to reevaluate it and decide if it’s the right fit for me. When something is right, I have no problems getting it done. In fact, I love a new project and challenge, so when something isn’t really exciting me, I know it’s not worth pursuing. In life, however, I have a list of to-do’s that is only getting longer because of my disdain for research. If I don’t understand something, I put it off. If I have to research something, it might take me a minute to get to it. Example? We have a cricket infestation at our house and I have yet to call the exterminator….why? Well, I don’t feel like reading reviews to find a good company that doesn’t doesn’t just try to upsell me. Things like that.
Extrovert? Me? Nope. In fact, I wrote an entire article about being an outgoing introvert. THAT is more my speed. I like to have fun and can hold my own in social settings, but I need to vibe with the people I’m with. I’m often mistaken for being cold when really I just have RBF [resting bitch face] and my tone is flat. I’m not the most exuberant or charismatic person. I don’t really show my emotions well. I am a Scorpio, after all. For those who have been following me for a while you know I’m a no-bullshit kind of girl. I don’t fake or pretend anything. You know that I may be excited, but I’m not loud and shrieky about stuff. I’m pretty cool, calm, and collected always. But anyway, those are things that don’t really fit my personality from this test.
The moral of the story is this: Because I have a passion that I’ve turned into my career, it is what I thrive on. I believe because of this I have placed a high priority on the success of my business and feel like I need to always be achieving. I am extremely goal-oriented and feel best when I achieve what I put my mind to. Since my business revolves around me / my personality, I’ve managed to find a way to blend what I do best creatively with my REAL and true self. I feel fulfilled because I don’t have to pretend to be someone I’m not (in a field [social media] where MANY people are pretending 24/7). I may not fit “The Achiever” bill perfectly, but I’m happy about that. Rather than be a statistic or someone who fits the mold of a certain “type,” I’m doing it my way. And honestly, I’m not even surprised one bit. I don’t like to be told what to do (something the test did NOT tell me), so it makes perfect sense.
Have you tried the Enneagram test? What was your score? Do you identify with it? Share!